Well, this is going to be a long read…
First and foremost, I’m a 14 year old female. I’m easily infatuated with somebody or something. For instance, when I was 10, apparently a boy liked me at school. I’d ask my Mom if we could go for a drive around the neighborhood, to try to pick out where he lived. I also used to pretend that we were a couple, (he was an imaginary boyfriend I suppose). I remember I asked his sister for their phone number, and I wrote it down on my wall and re-read it until I knew all of the digits off-by heart.
Also, when I got into high school, I really liked this guy. He spoke to me once (I had a broken leg, and he used my crutches). I wrote a diary all about him. I would stare at him at school, and in the afternoon or when I got home, I’d pretend that we were together. Also, the people that he hung out with, I’d pretend I was their best friend. I remember, I would go to the park and pretend to meet up with them. I also saved pictures of him on my computer and set it as my desktop background.
What else would I do…? I’d go into notepad, and write down sentences and pretend I got a message/email from the people that I liked, when I didn’t. I’d check their Myspace continuously, too.
I’d have at least 100+ pictures of them. I was infatuated. Infatuated! I never spoke to any of these people. At all. Whenever somebody mentioned them, I’d blush and keep quiet.
Also, I think I like this person (now). I haven’t spoken to them for 5 months, but everyday I look at their Youtube, Myspace & Facebook (at least 10 times a day) to see when they were last online. If they’ve got new pictures, that’s like treasure to me. I save them onto my computer and focus on the small, simple details.
Do you think I’ve got OCD, an addictive personality disorder, schizophrenia, anything?! I’m kind of wondering whether or not I’ve got psychosis … :/
Am I Mental?! Long Read But Important…wow?
By WinPie Posted in: windows
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i have ocd, an i don’t think it’s that, i wouldn’t say it’s an addictive personality disorder an i’m pretty sure you’re not schizophrenic! it sounds like you have some form of detachment from the real world as a method of coping with the real one we live in, coupled with low self esteem which is why you imagine these perfect scenarios and obsess over them.
i don’t think it’s as serious as you think but i would suggest that you talk to a doctor about it in case they are symptoms of a particular problem. you are not mental! people are not mental, they either have mental actions, or they suffer from a mental illness, i have 3 an i’m fine…just a bit weird i guess but i’m a psychology student an in a long term relationship, so i can’t be that bad?!!
you most probably have preconceived ideas about what will happen in a relationship and it may be damaging to you to experience real relationships as they very rarely pan out that way, this is why i think it is important that you have acknowledged that there is a slight issue, this means that you are self aware and probably quite intelligent, the important thing is to try to steer yourself away from this behaviour by controlling your thoughts and actually acting on your feelings, not hiding them behind a fantastic imagination.
if you like music, then remember that most lyrics are written because of personal experiences, the same goes for books and films, whether the experience be negative or positive, it still has an affect on a person and that is the greatness about life, no fantasy will ever cause you to have real heartbreak, but at the same time no fantasy will ever let you feel what it is to love and to be loved in return, that is the greatest feeling an you will miss out on it if you don’t manage to calm this down.
you are very creative and i suggest that you try writing romantic stories or poetry to let some of this creativity flow, but bite the bullet and speak to these people you fantasise about, you never know they may not be anything like you imagine and that could be good or bad!!
Do you have any problems at home? Maybe you just really crave a perfect life. Just remember, if you like someone, it’s much more satisfying to talk to them, rather than become obsessed with them.
Nah you’re no more mental than anybody else. You’re not going through their garbage or breaking in to their houses so I wouldn’t worry.
Have you ever tried to screw up the courage to talk to one of these people beyond your infatuation? Unfortunately rejection is a part of life and no matter how painful it is, it’s gonna happen once in a while. However until you try you’re not going to know if you’re going to be rejected or not.